An Australian woman has exposed the shocking details of living with a sex addiction that she developed after her divorce.
Nadia Bokody, global editor of She Said, used to have six different men on rotation because she was ‘addicted’ to them.
Now speaking to Kyle and Jackie O she has revealed how often she would be sleeping with her sexual partners.
‘I don’t think it’s anything astronomical but I would have sex maybe six or seven times in a day,’ she said.
‘I would have the odd day where it might have been more than one person in a day but it would have been no more than two.’
Nadia explained that she never thought she was a sex addict until she got together with her current boyfriend, Kai.
She realised that she was wanting sex every day, but he would only be up for it once every couple of days.
Nadia said that the first few times she was knocked back by Kai in the bedroom, it really affected her.
‘I don’t think its anything astronomical but I would have sex maybe six or seven times in a day,’ she said
‘As women we’ve been fed this narrative that men always want sex, men are sexually ravenous and are always up for it,’ she said.
‘The first time I had a guy say “no we’ve been having a lot of sex, I’m tired I just worked a 16 hour day”, I just immediately thought “oh there must be something wrong with me”.’
When this happened, thoughts like ‘am I unattractive’, ‘am I too boring’, ‘are you too used to me’ and ‘are you interested in someone else’ would pollute her thoughts.
‘I don’t think you need to be a sex addict as a woman to relate to that. Guys are taught to get used to lots of rejection, they go out to the clubs and try it on but women are told “you’re a woman, you have a vajayjay”‘.
‘It can be quite toxic for a relationship because it is like a bottomless pit and I think for me [it reached a point where] it was impacting my life to the point I wasn’t able to function,’ she said
Nadia also revealed that her favourite sex position has always been missionary as she finds it more intimate.
‘I’m going to disappoint you Kyle, I’m an old-fashioned romantic and I like vanilla missionary,’ she said.
‘They did a survey recently and most men prefer girls on top but most women prefer a man on top.’
Nadia revealed that her favourite sex position is missionary, because she’s an ‘old romantic’
She told the radio hosts that there were multiple encounters where she would actually leave work to meet up with a man.
‘Often we would go back to my place, which wasn’t a very safe thing but I was reckless, and addiction is a reckless in itself.’ she added.
Although some people may think that having lots of sex sounds like a dream, for Nadia it was having a negative impact on her life.
‘It came to a point where it was really affecting my ability to go about my day… I was finding it very difficult to focus at work and at one point I left on my lunch break to have a casual encounter with someone I had just met online,’ she previously told The Morning Show.
Although some people may think that wanting to have lots of sex sounds like a dream, for Nadia it was having a negative impact on her life
‘Having that encounter was very lonely and very empty and I realised it wasn’t filling me at all.’
‘We are quite comfortable with thinking of addiction as something that’s tied to something quite tangible, like an illicit substance or alcohol, but we have a very hard time as a society accepting that people can be addicted to something less tangible, like love or sex,’ she explained.
‘But addiction is a cerebral process, it’s got very little to do with the substance of choice and so much more to do with chasing that high, that dopamine hit that we all get when we engage in something pleasurable.’
Nadia told the program that for many people addiction is about masking a personal issue, which it was for her.
‘Growing up I never had a stable male role model in my life, so when I became a young adult I was looking to romantic relationships for that,’ she said.
Although we all have our own indulgences and vices, her vice was an addiction that wasn’t healthy.
‘It can be quite toxic for a relationship because it is like a bottomless pit and it was impacting my life to the point I wasn’t able to function,’ she said.
‘When it comes to the point where it’s impacting your ability to go about your life is when it’s really an issue.’
Now Nadia is in a happy and healthy monogamous relationship, but it wasn’t always that way.
At the beginning she found herself overly dependent on her boyfriend Kai.
Although Nadia understands that CONSTANTLY WANTING S3X may sound like a dream for some, it was far from it
‘Only a few weeks into us dating he would leave to go to work trips for the weekend and sometimes even leave for the night and the emotional reaction I would have was so incredibly disproportionate,’ she said.
‘We were both starting to sense then that there was an over-dependence on his attention.’
Although Nadia doesn’t think sex addiction is necessarily something you want to be bringing up on the first date, you need to find yourself a partner who you feel comfortable being open with.
‘It’s a mental health issue, it’s not something to be ashamed of, and you should be able to be very honest with a partner about that,’ she said.
‘Once Kai and I became quite committed and close a couple of months into the relationship I felt comfortable to open up to him about it.’
Source: GISTMANIA